Is There Such a Thing as an "Un-working Mom?"

Today as I was making lunch for the little ones while emptying the dishwasher, making a bottle and putting postage on all our bills I remembered a conversation I had with a fellow parent at school last week. She mentioned that we should check with the working moms on a time to have a meeting. I didn't really think anything of it, but today as I was busy in the kitchen I thought to myself..."Is there really such a thing as a mom that doesn't work?" AND, while the kids were eating I sat down at the table with my laptop and checked my email and updated my status on facebook as to my thoughts on the subject.

I knew exactly what she meant, but also thought it is time to come up with a new term for mom's that also work outside the home in a corporate setting. So, when I put in my status that I wondered if there was such a thing as an un-working mother, my thought was that the words 'working' and 'mother' were one in the same. Simple as that. I personally wasn't offended or appalled, it was just a topic got got me thinking.

So, after the kids were in bed this evening and I got back to my email I was pretty surprised to see all the responses! I would also like to take a moment to respond:

I never meant to hurt any one's feelings and I apologize if you felt the need to explain, defend or justify your decision. That was never my intent and I would hope that you never feel the need to defend you job as a mother. I received quite a few messages asking me to explain. I truly believe that there is no greater joy & blessing than to be a mother. The days are long, the tasks sometimes seem tedious, there is no income, often not many thanks, there can be much heartache and worry, BUT the reward is great.

I grew up in a home where my own mother worked. She worked in the evenings and on weekends to make ends meet. My parents sacrificed much to give us even more. When we would ask my parents why we couldn't have a bigger house or fancier car they always told us it was because they sent us to a private school. I can even remember many times telling them I would be fine to attend a public school, and it wasn't until my young adult life that I realized just what a sacrifice it was and just how much they would do for us.

I admire mothers that work outside the home. I often think about my friends that have to get up out of their houses for hours and hours and then come home to a house in need. I respect those that spend years finishing degrees and those that they are hopefully doing something that they love. I used to work full time outside the house for a little over five years with my oldest. I can remember thinking "how lucky" the moms who got to stay home all day with their kids really were! All I thought about all day was being home with my little boy, but knew if I didn't work we would have no place to live, food to eat, no diapers or car. It was completely necessary that I work full time while attending college. I only saw my little one for about 5 hours a day. I understand completely that situation.

I also admire women who don't work outside the home. The ones that take care of the needs of their families from the inside full time. When my oldest went off to kindergarten I was able to quit my job and work at home full time. I understand that this too can seem glamorous. I don't think I fully understood what it all entailed. I thought for sure I'd be able to catch Oprah now and then;) Now, as a mother of five I cannot believe the workload! My days usually start before 6 a.m. and before I know it it's usually 10p.m. in no time. Bathing children, dressing them, preparing 3 meals, being their teacher, disciplinarian, nurse, referee, doing the grocery shopping, the carpooling, the cleaning, the laundry and still making time to play with and love my kids is no easy task. Some days I think to myself "I am not cut out for this!"


Thankfully, I have a God who is faithful, loving and patient who is molding me and teaching me every day to be the person to fulfill all of this. I am still learning each new day.


I would just like to say that I love each of you...close friends or distant acquaintances. I think that you are all wonderful mothers and I know you do all you can to love and raise your kids the best way you can. It's important to support each other and let each other know just how great a job we think they do. I know each of us would do anything for our little ones and know that whatever you are doing....wherever you are...you are doing the best.

I never knew how much love my heart could hold...until someone called me "mom."

A Little Girl Time

I remember the days of going to the mall with my friends. Back in the day we used to go and wander around for hours, stop in at the candy shop, browse the stores and were never on any kind of schedule.

These days my trips to mall are like the power hours after Thanksgiving, only it's not. Shopping for the needs of seven people in our home is a very extensive task. Not only am I required to know each person's exact need and size/color preference, but I also must do so with a budget in mind.

Today was a very different shopping day for me. This afternoon I was able to sneak out of the house with only one little four year old girl. She was beyond excited. We had the entire afternoon to ourselves. There really wasn't anything that we needed but I thought it would be fun if I took Madison with me to look for a dress for Easter. Ummm, mistake number one. I forgot that she is my daughter. Not only did she want to try on every beautiful dress that she came across but also any other item she happened to see. This is one little girl who could shop all day and never drop.

I have never really taken any of the kids shopping to get things for them. It would be near disastrous. Almost every store we went into she ooohed and aahhed at all the merchandise and almost every time asked me "what should I get?"

Well, the only purchase we made was for two cute little headbands and a reusable shopping bag. Oak Brook was empty and we wandered around checking out anything we thought to be of interest. We even stopped at the coffee shop for a little treat. After our shopping trip was over we had a fine dining experience at California Pizza Kitchen. I'm pretty sure it's one of Madison's new favorites. At dinner Madison looked up at me and said "I just love spendin' time alone with you, Mom" and just before a tear could leave my eye she added "because you bought me a headband." I said "What if I didn't buy you anything?" and without missing a beat she said "but you did." I hope I have not taught her to be materialistic, but today I am going to take that comment and cherish her sweet words. What a great little "girl time" we had.

Hockey

These days the main activity in our house is hockey. For Christmas this year we gave all the kids skates and sticks. Not a day goes by that one of the kids doesn't ask to go skating.

Almost every Saturday since Christmas James and the kids have a date. First they go to breakfast at Egg Harbor then head off to Burns Field for a little skating. There are usually a few other groups there and when the kids get tired of skating they run and play in the field while James gets to play a little hockey.

The kids are doing surprisingly great with skating. This is their first year and already Madison is doing circles around most of the other kids! It's exciting to see. Another day for some outside enjoyment has been Sunday afternoon. Brett loves to play a game or two with the other kids in Hinsdale. James and I also got Brett some pads and gloves and he's loving every minute!

We've been blessed with lots of snow this winter and it's not over yet...after last weeks estimated 12-14 inches we are supposed to get some more early next week. What a beautiful sight all this snow is! It covers the grey, dirty streets and yards with a fresh coat of sparkling sunshine.

There Went My Wisdom

On Monday of this week I lost a little wisdom....four little wisdom teeth, actually. I have been putting it off for some time now.

I knew about 8 years ago that they were coming in and I experienced some serious pain as they began crowding my mouth, but over the last eight years my life always seemed a little too busy to have to sit "out" for a week. I was either pregnant or nursing most of those years and it gave me a great excuse to NOT have my wisdom teeth pulled.

Well, now 5 days post-op I am starting to feel slightly back to normal. I opted to not be put out for the surgery so I just had some shots in my mouth to do the numbing. I didn't want to have a nauseous feeling on top of pain in my mouth so that is why I went that route. I have had three prior surgeries (c-sections) so I know about all the noises, pressures and pulling that goes on so I am not easily fazed by them.

It only took less than 50 minutes form start to finish and I was on my way home. My sister had the day off so she so kindly offered to bring me and take me home. I left the office with face numb from my cheeks throughout my entire lower jaw. I couldn't talk at all. I was doing some sign language and lots of pointing. After I arrived home the kids kept a pretty good distance from me. I wish I had taken a picture. I didn't even look like myself. I sat down and leaned over to talk to James and I must had drooled a little. Dylan shot off the couch and said "Daddy, why is Mama drooling?" I laughed, but all day the kids prayed at mealtime that I would "get back to normal" and " be a more normal Mama" soon.

I have been on a liquid diet all week. Lots of jello, yogurt, broth, Italian ice and even some beans...well, baked beans. The funny thing is you couldn't pay me to really eat them before, but after two days of almost not eating at all a friend brought our family a roasted chicken dinner that also included beans. I was starving and knew I needed the protein so I tried them. They were quite possibly the best things I have eaten in a long time! Thanks, Kristie!

Over all the week was pretty calm. I was able to completely relax. James had the whole week off & when he had things to do he just took the little children with him. I am so blessed to have a husband who takes such good care of me in times like these. For better or worse, right?

6 Month Baby Stats

Our baby is growing WAY too fast! At her sixth month well baby check last week we couldn't believe how big she has gotten! Here are her 6 month stats:

Mackenzie weighs 21 lbs,

is 27.5 inches long,

and is continuing to follow the 96th percentile for both!

The doctor couldn't believe just how much she can do. I really can't either. She is officially crawling now. Just the other day after a full month of inching around like a caterpillar, she started using her hands to crawl now. She will give you a "high five" if you ask her, and if you ask for a hug she will put her head down on your chest. She is eating fruits and veggies now, too.

Mackenzie is still quite possibly the world's current perfect baby. I had no idea that she cut her very first two teeth last week too! The age old question about if her runny nose had anything to do with it or if it was a cold really didn't matter. It's gone now and she's chompin' away with those two little teeth!

This is one baby who never stops smiling...and it's contagious!